What Happened to Kurtis Wigton?

Someone keeps typing "What happened to Kurtis Wigton" into search engines, and always stumbles back to here.  So before I see it pop up too many times, and before the lump that rises in my throat each time I read that and wonder who it is that is asking gets any larger, let me answer your question for you...

This is all you need to know about what really happened to my husband...

He filled many of his dreams.  He fell in love.  He found a wife.  He had a child.

He learned to cook.  And do laundry.  And clean the toilet the right way.  I know - because I taught him.

He sang.  He played the guitar.  He found peace, solace, comfort, and amusement in music.

He stood in the ocean, and on top of mountains.  He gazed at the Grand Canyon, and gambled (and lost) in Vegas.  He kissed Mickey Mouse.

He found a job that he loved, and learned it is not what you do with yourself, but how you do it that matters.

He laughed.  He smiled.  He cried.

He loved.  Deeply.  And passionately.

He also died. Far too soon.  Long before he, and those who loved him were ready.  But of the nearly 13 000 days he graced this planet, that day is only one.  0.00007% of his time on this Earth.  And thus deserves only a footnote.

I know I concentrate too much on his death.  I'm working hard to see beyond it.  And trying not to let that define him, even if sometimes I fail.

So when you ask "What happened to Kurtis Wigton?", knowing that you are really looking for those last few moments, I ask you why does it matter?  Why should be be defined by how we leave, rather than what we do when we are here.

So what really happened to Kurtis Wigton?  What would he want you to take away from his life?

He lived.  A full, complete life, albeit a short one.  His life, my life, and your life are a mixture of good and bad.  Easy and hard.  Happy and sad.  And when he left this world, I have no doubts that he was happy.  His life was full.  And our corner of the world was a little better because he had been in it.

He changed his world.  He went from a place where he felt he had nothing, to a place where he felt he had it all.  And he did it just by putting one foot in front of the other, and keeping on keeping on.

Yes, I watched him change his world.  And in the process, he also changed mine.  He taught me more about myself and what I wanted... about love and life... in our 5 years together than any of the 27 years that came before.

That's what happened to Kurtis Wigton.  I hope you are all that lucky.  I hope it happens to us all....